Relax Needless Fear Around Others
People don’t care what you’re doing – you are just a bit player in their own personal drama. Or if they do care, it’s a passing feeling.
Pet the Lizard
The brain is highly integrated, so these three key functions – avoiding, approaching, and attaching – are accomplished by all parts of the brain working together.
Avoid The Rush
Be mindful of rushing. See how other people assume deadlines that aren’t actually real, or feel pressured about things that aren’t that important.
Let It R.A.I.N.
R.A.I.N. is an acronym developed by Michelle McDonald but adapted a bit by me, to summarize a powerful way to expand self-awareness.
Stay Well
To stay well, make sure you’re getting enough sleep, eating correctly, doing exercise regularly, avoiding health hazards, and having regular checkups.
Welcome Joy
What’s the spark and what’s the fuel? Welcome joy. Positive emotions – such as feelings of gratitude, love, and confidence – strengthen the immune system, protect the heart against loss and trauma, build relationships, increase resilience
Transform Ill Will
Goodwill and ill will are about intention: the will is for good or ill. Ill will creates negative, vicious cycles. But that means that good will can create positive cycles. Plus good will cultivates wholesome qualities in you.
Love Freely
Love is in our nature, woven into our DNA. Love is a natural wellspring inside us all. It doesn’t need to be pushed or pumped. It needs to be released.
Grow Inner Strengths
Inner strengths are the supplies you’ve got in your pack as you make your way down the twisting and often hard road of life.
See Good Intentions
By recognizing positive intentions we feel safer, supported, and happier. You have to actively look for good intentions. The practice of looking for good intentions may make you happier, and give you a stronger sense of our common humanity.
Speak Wisely
Often it’s words and the accompanying tone that actually do the most damage. Your ability to speak wisely can prevent lasting emotional pain.
Notice You’re Alright Right Now
To keep our ancestors alive, the brain evolved strong tendencies toward fear. It’s important to regularly remind yourself that you’re alright right now.
Find Your Own Way
In the body or the mind, there is no life without goals. Trying to “transcend” goals is itself a goal. The only question is: Are your goals good ones?
See Deep Wants
When deeper wants are recognized one feels seen and less likely to be reactive. See deep wants is understanding what someone may want and giving them an alternative offering which may reduce negative emotion and increased cooperation.
Make Good Bargains
Life is full of tradeoffs between benefits and costs. Sometimes the rewards of going for a run, getting fresh air, and improving health may be worth the cost of losing half an hour of work time while gaining a pair of achy legs.