See Deep Wants
When deeper wants are recognized one feels seen and less likely to be reactive. See deep wants is understanding what someone may want and giving them an alternative offering which may reduce negative emotion and increased cooperation.
Accept It
Acceptance is the foundation of wisdom and inner peace. It is easy to accept life’s beautiful things. It is the hard things in life that are hard to accept. The sweet spot is both by accepting the fact that they are what they are.
Be the Body
The fabric of your mind is woven by your body. Focus on what others communicate, and try to receive that as a valuable offering. Open your mind to the good that is implicit or down deep in the other person.
Let It Go
Are you holding onto at least one thing that’s way past its expiration date? Self-critical thoughts, obsessions, defensive about your issues, or drinking too much. These things are relatively straightforward to deal with, even though it could be difficult.
Make Good Bargains
Life is full of tradeoffs between benefits and costs. Sometimes the rewards of going for a run, getting fresh air, and improving health may be worth the cost of losing half an hour of work time while gaining a pair of achy legs.
See Good Intentions
By recognizing positive intentions we feel safer, supported, and happier. You have to actively look for good intentions. The practice of looking for good intentions may make you happier, and give you a stronger sense of our common humanity.
Find What’s Sacred
Sacred, has two meanings. One means spirituality, the other something precious. Try to identify what is sacred to you. Maybe you already know.
Empty the Cup
What’s the “wallpaper” in your own mind? Enjoy emptiness in the forms, the space between thoughts as your mind calms and becomes still, when you have no plans at all.
Make The Offering
Try considering your contributions as offerings, particularly the little things. Listen to your heart for offerings calling to be expressed. Maybe it’s the offering of never speaking out of anger, or really starting that novel, or determining to give love each day.
Remember the Big Things
In every life, reminders arrive about what’s really important. While it’s good advice not to sweat the small stuff, we also need to nurture the large stuff.
Lower the Pressure
The pressure activates motivational circuits but has inherent collateral damage. Pressure activates ancient motivational circuits that were very effective in keeping our ancestors alive but even at best, there is an inherent collateral damage.
See Your Part
Acknowledging one’s own part in a difficult situation is one of the hardest – and I think most honorable – things a person can do.
Relax, You’ve Arrived
Part of this comes from our biological nature. To survive, animals – including us – have to be goal-directed, leaning into the future. This focus – can get confused and stressful.
Rest
Encourage your mind to come to rest at least occasionally. Tell the truth to yourself about how much time you actually – other than sleep.
Welcome Joy
What’s the spark and what’s the fuel? Welcome joy. Positive emotions – such as feelings of gratitude, love, and confidence – strengthen the immune system, protect the heart against loss and trauma, build relationships, increase resilience