How to Stop Ruminating: Insights & Practical Tips from Experts

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We’ve all been there—caught in a loop of overthinking, replaying past mistakes, or worrying about things we can’t control. It’s exhausting. But you don’t have to stay stuck. In this guide, you’ll find expert-backed tips from Rick Hanson, a psychologist and bestselling author known for his work on resilience and well-being. Rick’s insights will help you shift your mind from rumination to a more peaceful, balanced state. You’ll learn simple, practical ways to break free from overthinking—so you can feel lighter, more present, and truly at ease. Let’s get started.

What is Rumination?

Rumination is a pattern of overthinking that keeps your mind stuck on distressing thoughts. The National Institute of Health describes it as a form of perseverative cognition, meaning repeated, intrusive thinking that focuses on negative experiences. Studies show that rumination is linked to emotional distress and mental health conditions like depression, anxiety, and PTSD. It can even affect physical health by increasing stress-related symptoms and pain perception.

According to Rick Hanson, rumination keeps the brain locked in a cycle of worry and self-criticism. Our brains naturally focus on negative experiences—what he calls the negativity bias—which makes it easy to dwell on past mistakes or anxieties. But the good news? You can break free. Training your mind to shift away from rumination—by focusing on positive experiences, practicing mindfulness, and rewiring your thought patterns—can help you feel more at ease and resilient.

To better understand what rumination is, how to recognize it, and practical ways to break free, watch the video below for expert insights.

What are the Main Signs of Rumination

Rumination is when your thoughts get stuck on the same distressing loops—going over past mistakes, replaying conversations, or obsessing about things you can’t change. Instead of leading to clarity or resolution, rumination tends to amplify distress, making you feel worse the longer it goes on.

So how can you tell if you’re simply overthinking or if you’ve fallen into rumination?

1. Your thoughts feel repetitive and unproductive. You keep returning to the same worries without gaining new insights.
2. You focus on problems rather than solutions. Instead of thinking about what you can do next, your mind stays stuck on what went wrong.
3. You feel emotionally drained. Rather than helping you move forward, your thoughts make you feel worse—more anxious, guilty, or hopeless.
4. It interferes with daily life. If rumination keeps you up at night or distracts you from work, relationships, or daily tasks, it may be a problem.
5. You feel trapped in past events. Instead of considering the present or future, your mind keeps circling past regrets or failures.

How to Stop Ruminating: Practical Steps to Break the Cycle

The following tips, drawn from Rick Hanson’s experience, will help you break free from rumination and build a habit of thinking in ways that truly support your well-being.

1. Name It to Tame It

When your mind gets stuck in rumination, one of the simplest but most powerful things you can do is call it out. The act of naming what’s happening shifts your brain from being inside the thought to observing it from the outside. This creates space between you and the rumination, making it easier to break free. Instead of being swept away in the mental loop, you become aware of it—and awareness is the first step toward change.

How to Do It:

1. Take a deep breath and name the pattern: “Oh, I’m caught in rumination again.”
2. Be specific: “I’m replaying that conversation over and over,” or “I’m stuck worrying about something I can’t control.”
3. By naming it, you engage the part of your brain that helps you step back and see the bigger picture.

Once you do this, it’s easier to shift gears and move on, instead of getting lost in endless mental chatter.

Why It Helps:

When you name a thought pattern, you weaken its grip. Instead of being completely absorbed in the thought, you create a bit of distance, and that distance gives you more control. Your brain starts recognizing that rumination is just a habit, not something you have to follow. With time, this simple practice helps you shift your focus more easily.

Rumination Example:

Let’s say you keep replaying a mistake you made at work. Instead of sinking into self-criticism, you pause and say to yourself: “Oh, I’m overanalyzing this again.” Just acknowledging it helps loosen its hold, so you can gently redirect your mind.

2. Redirect Attention to the Present Moment

Rumination drags you into the past or the future, but your real life is happening right now. The more you bring your attention back to the present moment, the less power rumination has. This isn’t about forcing yourself to stop thinking—it’s about giving your mind something better to focus on. Your breath, your surroundings, or even a small movement in your body can help ground you in what’s real and happening right now.

How to Do It:

1. Tune into your senses: Notice the sounds around you, the feeling of your clothes, or the temperature of the air.
2. Use your breath: Inhale slowly, count to four, and exhale even slower.
3. Find a neutral focus point: It could be the feeling of your feet on the floor, the weight of your hands, or a simple everyday object.

Why It Helps:

Rumination keeps your brain locked in a mental loop, but when you bring your attention to the present, you disrupt that cycle. Your mind can’t be fully absorbed in rumination and also fully present at the same time. The more you practice this, the easier it becomes to shift out of overthinking and into simply being here.

Rumination Example:

You’re lying in bed, cycling through regrets. Instead of getting lost in them, you shift your focus to how your breath feels in your chest. You keep bringing your attention back each time your mind wanders. Slowly, the rumination starts to fade.

3. Shift from Why to What

A huge part of rumination is getting stuck in “why” questions. Why did this happen? Why did they say that? Why can’t I move on? But these questions rarely lead anywhere—they just keep you spinning in circles. The way out? Ask “what” instead of “why.”

How to Do It:

1. Instead of “Why did this go wrong?”, try “What can I learn from this?”
2. Instead of “Why can’t I stop thinking about this?”, ask “What can I do right now to shift my focus?”
3. If there’s no action to take, let yourself accept that and move on.

Why It Helps:

“Why” questions keep your mind dwelling on the past. “What” questions gently nudge you toward solutions and action. Even when there’s no immediate answer, shifting to curiosity instead of self-blame can make a big difference in how you feel.

Rumination Example:

You’re stuck replaying an argument. Instead of asking “Why did they say that?”, you shift to “What’s a constructive way I can move forward?” This small change helps break the mental cycle.

4. Make a Decision and Stick to It

Sometimes, rumination is just disguised indecision—going back and forth over the same thing without ever landing on a choice. The more you delay, the more space your mind has to overanalyze. Making a firm decision closes the loop and frees up your energy.

How to Do It:

1. Set a deadline: Give yourself a time limit to decide.

• Choose the best option with what you know now.

1. Once you decide, stop revisiting it. Move forward with confidence.

Why It Helps:

The brain craves closure. When you make a decision and commit to it, you stop the endless second-guessing. Even if it’s not a perfect choice, you gain clarity and move forward instead of staying stuck in the same mental loop.

Rumination Example:

You’ve been debating whether to apply for a new job. Instead of thinking about it for weeks, you give yourself a deadline: “I’ll decide by Friday and then move forward.” The clarity breaks the cycle of rumination.

5. Be Kind to Yourself

Rumination often comes with a harsh inner voice—judging yourself for past mistakes, worrying about what others think, or feeling like you’re not doing enough. But the truth is, you don’t have to be perfect to be worthy of kindness. Learning to treat yourself with warmth and understanding can help ease the grip of rumination and bring more peace into your mind.

How to Do It:

1. Notice how you talk to yourself—would you say the same things to a friend?
2. Replace harsh thoughts with something gentler: Instead of “I always mess up,” try “I did my best with what I knew then.”
3. Imagine how you’d comfort someone else in your situation—then give yourself that same kindness.

Why It Helps:

Self-judgment feeds rumination, while self-kindness quiets it. When you practice gentleness with yourself, your brain starts learning that it doesn’t need to keep replaying every mistake or worry. Over time, this habit helps you feel lighter and more at ease.

Rumination Example:

You’re stuck in guilt over something you said. Instead of beating yourself up, you remind yourself: “I see what happened, I’ll do better next time, and I don’t need to keep punishing myself.” This shift allows you to move on.

6. Shift Your Perspective with Gratitude

Rumination narrows your focus onto what’s wrong, what’s missing, or what could go wrong. But gratitude works like a mental reset button—it expands your awareness and helps you see what’s still good, steady, and supportive in your life. It doesn’t mean ignoring problems, but it helps balance your perspective so you’re not stuck in negativity.

How to Do It:

1. Take a moment to name three things you’re grateful for right now—big or small.
2. If you’re ruminating about something painful, find one small good thing within it. Maybe you learned something, or maybe it showed you what you truly care about.
3. Write down one positive thing that happened today—even if it was just a moment of fresh air or a kind word from someone.

Why It Helps:

Your brain naturally fixates on problems, but gratitude gently shifts your focus to what’s working. Over time, this rewires your mind to notice more of the good, making it easier to break free from rumination.

Rumination Example:

You’re stuck in frustration about a mistake you made. Instead of replaying it, you pause and think: “What’s one thing I did well today?” Maybe you handled another challenge with patience. This small shift loosens the grip of rumination.

7. Give Your Mind a Job with Active Engagement

One reason rumination takes over is because your mind has nothing else to do—so it keeps spinning the same thoughts. A simple but effective way to stop this is to actively engage in something that requires your full attention. When your brain is focused elsewhere, there’s no space left for rumination.

How to Do It:

1. Pick an activity that absorbs your attention—like cooking, playing music, painting, or solving a puzzle.
2. If your body needs to move, go for a brisk walk and focus on your surroundings.
3. Call a friend and genuinely listen to what they’re saying—this shifts your focus from yourself to them.

Why It Helps:

Rumination thrives in mental stillness. But when you actively engage your attention, your brain naturally moves away from overthinking and into the present. This helps create mental flexibility—the ability to shift out of unhelpful thoughts.

Rumination Example:

You’re overanalyzing a conversation. Instead of getting lost in thought, you grab a sketchbook and start doodling. Your brain shifts gears, and before you know it, the rumination has faded.

8. Talk It Out – But with the Right Person

Sometimes, ruminating thoughts feel overwhelming because they have nowhere to go. Talking things through can break the cycle, but it’s important to choose the right approach—not just venting, but actually getting perspective.

How to Do It:

1. Share your thoughts with someone who helps you gain clarity—not someone who fuels the negativity.
2. Before you talk, ask yourself: “Do I want support or just validation?” This helps guide the conversation.
3. If no one is available, write down your thoughts as if you were talking to a friend—this alone can help release them.

Why It Helps:

Rumination is like being stuck in a mental echo chamber—it repeats itself until something breaks the loop. Talking things out externalizes your thoughts, making them easier to process. The key is choosing conversations that help you move forward, rather than keeping you stuck.

Rumination Example:

You keep replaying a job interview that didn’t go well. Instead of overanalyzing alone, you talk to a friend who reminds you of your strengths and helps you refocus on your next step.

9. Set a “Worry Time” to Contain Your Thoughts

If your brain keeps bringing up the same worries, give them a designated space instead of letting them run all day. Setting a specific “worry time” teaches your brain that you’re in control—not the other way around.

How to Do It:

1. Pick a 10-15 minute time slot where you can think about whatever is on your mind.
2. During the day, if a ruminating thought pops up, remind yourself: “Not now. I’ll deal with this during my worry time.”
3. When worry time arrives, write down your thoughts and brainstorm solutions—or simply acknowledge them, then move on.

Why It Helps:

Your brain stops constantly interrupting you with worries when it knows there’s a time set aside to process them. Over time, this habit reduces the intensity of rumination and helps you build control over your thoughts.

Rumination Example:

You keep stressing about an upcoming deadline. Instead of worrying all day, you tell yourself: “I’ll think about this at 6 PM.” When 6 PM comes, you spend 10 minutes writing down a plan—and then let it go.

10. Take in the Good to Rewire Your Brain

Rick Hanson often talks about the power of “taking in the good”—the idea that when you slow down and fully absorb positive moments, they stick in your brain and gradually shift how you think. Since rumination trains your brain to focus on the negative, this practice counteracts that by strengthening positive pathways instead.

How to Do It:

1. The next time you feel even a small moment of peace, warmth, or happiness, pause and let it sink in.
2. Close your eyes and stay with the feeling for 10-15 seconds—let it imprint.
3. Practice this regularly so your brain gets better at absorbing positive experiences.

Why It Helps:

Your brain is wired to hold onto negative experiences more than positive ones. But when you slow down and deeply absorb good moments, you help retrain your mind to focus on what nourishes you instead of what drains you. Over time, this makes rumination less automatic.

Rumination Example:

You catch yourself enjoying a sunset, but your mind tries to wander back to an old regret. Instead, you pause, take in the colors, the air, the quiet feeling—letting it really sink in. Your brain learns to hold onto this moment, making it easier to break the rumination habit over time.

11. Engage Your Body – Because Thoughts and Feelings Live There Too

When rumination takes over, you might feel stuck in your head—but your body is a powerful tool for grounding yourself in the present moment. Instead of trying to stop rumination by thinking your way out of it, move your body to reset your nervous system.

How to Do It:

1. Change your posture—if you’re sitting hunched over, straighten up and take a deep breath.
2. Go for a walk—even five minutes of movement shifts your energy.
3. Use your hands—knead dough, fold laundry, play with a pet—something that gets your body involved.
4. Try progressive muscle relaxation—tighten and release different muscle groups to physically shake off tension.

Why It Helps:

Thoughts don’t just exist in your mind—they show up in your body too. Movement helps release the tension rumination creates, making it easier to break free from the cycle.

Rumination Example:

You’re stuck overanalyzing a decision. Instead of staying frozen in thought, you stand up, stretch, and walk around the room. As your body moves, your thoughts begin to loosen their grip.

12. Imagine a Compassionate Friend Talking to You

One of Rick’s key insights is that self-compassion is the antidote to self-criticism. Often, when we ruminate, we’re stuck in negative self-talk—replaying mistakes, doubts, or worries. A powerful way to break free is to imagine how a kind and wise friend would talk to you instead.

How to Do It:

1. Think of someone who genuinely cares about you—a best friend, a mentor, or even a supportive fictional character.
2. Imagine they’re sitting with you as you ruminate—what would they say?
3. Write down their words as if they were speaking to you.

Why It Helps:

Your brain is more open to reassurance from others than from yourself. When you picture a compassionate voice instead of the harsh one in your head, you start to shift your inner dialogue in a healthier direction.

Rumination Example:

You keep ruminating over a decision you regret. Instead of spiraling, you picture a wise friend saying, “You did the best you could with what you knew at the time. It’s okay.” This softens the rumination and brings comfort.

13. Practice Mindfulness to Step Out of the Loop

Rumination keeps your mind stuck in the past, but mindfulness brings you back to the present. Instead of getting lost in repetitive thoughts, try to notice what’s happening right now—your breath, the warmth of your hands, the sounds in the room. Mindfulness isn’t about stopping thoughts; it’s about seeing them without getting caught up in them.

How to Do It:

1. Pause and take a slow, deep breath, feeling the air move in and out.
2. Focus on your senses—what you can see, hear, and touch right now.
3. Try a simple mindfulness practice like body scanning, where you gently bring attention to different parts of your body.
4. If thoughts pull you in, notice them without judgment and return to your breath or surroundings.

Why It Helps:

Mindfulness helps you step back from rumination rather than getting tangled in it. It trains your brain to observe thoughts instead of drowning in them, creating space for more clarity and calm.

Rumination Example:

You’re replaying a conversation in your head, worrying about what you said. Instead of spiraling, you pause, take a deep breath, and focus on how your feet feel on the ground. By shifting attention to the present, the rumination starts to lose its power.

14. Use Journaling to Gain Clarity

Writing things down helps you organize your thoughts instead of letting them swirl endlessly in your mind. It allows you to step back and see patterns, recognize distortions, and work through emotions in a way that feels more concrete.

How to Do It:

1. Free-write your thoughts—let them flow without worrying about grammar or structure.
2. Try structured prompts like: What’s on my mind? What’s the worst that could happen? What would I tell a friend in this situation?
3. Write a compassionate letter to yourself, as if you were comforting a friend.
4. Keep a gratitude journal—list three things you’re grateful for each day to shift your focus from negativity to appreciation.

Why It Helps:

Journaling slows down your thought process and turns vague worries into something tangible. Seeing your thoughts on paper helps you untangle them and gain a sense of control.

Rumination Example:

You’re stuck thinking about a mistake you made at work. Instead of ruminating, you write down what happened, how you feel, and what you can learn from it. Putting it on paper helps clear your mind and find a more balanced perspective.

How to Make This Work: Turning Insights Into Action

Breaking free from rumination takes practice, but small, consistent efforts can create lasting change. Here’s how to start applying these tips in your daily life:

1. Start Small and Choose What Feels Right – Don’t overwhelm yourself by trying everything at once. Pick one or two tips that resonate with you and begin there.
2. Practice in the Moment – When you notice yourself ruminating, pause and apply a technique right away. The more you interrupt the cycle, the weaker it becomes.
3. Be Patient and Kind to Yourself – Change takes time, and setbacks are part of the process. If a strategy doesn’t work immediately, don’t judge yourself—keep experimenting with different approaches.
4. Use Journaling to Track Progress – Writing down your experiences can help you recognize patterns, see what’s working, and celebrate small wins along the way.
5. Pair It with Mindfulness for Deeper Impact – Combining these techniques with mindful breathing, meditation, or grounding exercises can help you stay present and prevent rumination from taking hold.

When to Seek Professional Help

If rumination is interfering with your daily life, causing persistent distress, anxiety, or depression, or making it hard to function, seeking professional support can be a crucial step. A therapist can provide personalized strategies and guidance to help you regain control of your thoughts.

Rumination vs. Grieving: How to Tell the Difference

It’s natural to revisit painful experiences when dealing with loss, disappointment, or major life changes. But not all repetitive thinking is unhealthy. Sometimes, the mind needs to process emotions, and that’s where grieving and reflection come in. However, when thoughts become stuck in a repetitive, self-critical, or hopeless cycle, that’s rumination—and it can prolong suffering rather than help you heal.

How Grieving Helps You Process & Heal

Grief is an adaptive process that allows you to work through difficult emotions in a way that fosters acceptance and meaning. When grieving, you may find yourself thinking about a loss, but there’s movement—emotions rise and fall, and over time, there’s a sense of resolution or integration.

Signs You’re Grieving (Not Ruminating):

✔ Your emotions shift over time. You may feel deep sadness, but it ebbs and flows, making room for moments of relief.

✔ You’re remembering with meaning. Thoughts may focus on honoring, learning, or adjusting to life after the loss.

✔ There’s a sense of emotional release. Crying, talking, or reflecting brings relief rather than just more distress.

✔ You’re integrating the experience. Even if it’s painful, there’s an eventual movement toward healing and acceptance.

How Rumination Keeps You Stuck

Rumination, on the other hand, keeps your mind trapped in circular, repetitive thinking without resolution. Instead of allowing emotions to be processed, it replays distressing thoughts without leading to healing.

Signs of Rumination (Not Healthy Grieving):

❌ Your thoughts feel stuck. You replay the same painful moments over and over without new insight or emotional movement.

❌ There’s a harsh inner critic. Instead of remembering with compassion, you get trapped in regret, guilt, or self-blame.

❌ It amplifies distress rather than releasing it. The more you think, the worse you feel—like being caught in quicksand.

❌ It prevents emotional integration. Instead of accepting the loss and moving forward, you feel paralyzed by it.

FAQs About Stopping Rumination

1. How long does it take to stop ruminating?

There’s no set timeline, but with consistent practice, many people notice improvements in a few weeks to months. Patience and repetition are key.

2. Can mindfulness really help with rumination?

Yes! Mindfulness helps shift your attention away from negative loops by bringing you back to the present moment, reducing over-identification with distressing thoughts.

3. Is rumination a sign of a mental health condition?

It can be. While occasional rumination is normal, persistent, uncontrollable rumination may be linked to anxiety, depression, or OCD and could require professional help.

4. What should I do if I can’t stop ruminating?

Start with small steps—use grounding techniques, shift your focus, or write your thoughts down. If it feels overwhelming, seeking therapy can provide additional support.

5. Can journaling help with rumination?

Yes, writing down repetitive thoughts can help you process emotions, gain perspective, and reduce their grip over time.

6. What’s the first step to breaking free from rumination?

Recognizing that you’re ruminating is the first step. Once you notice it happening, use one of the techniques, like self-compassion or shifting focus, to interrupt the cycle.

Stephanie Veillon is a creative director and instructional designer with over 15 years of experience supporting clients in the mindfulness, personal growth, well-being, learning, and psychology fields. She leverages technology, design, marketing, and best online practices to tell client stories and enhance student experience.