Speak Wisely
Often it’s words and the accompanying tone that actually do the most damage. Your ability to speak wisely can prevent lasting emotional pain.
Notice You’re Alright Right Now
To keep our ancestors alive, the brain evolved strong tendencies toward fear. It’s important to regularly remind yourself that you’re alright right now.
Find Your Own Way
In the body or the mind, there is no life without goals. Trying to “transcend” goals is itself a goal. The only question is: Are your goals good ones?
See Deep Wants
When deeper wants are recognized one feels seen and less likely to be reactive. See deep wants is understanding what someone may want and giving them an alternative offering which may reduce negative emotion and increased cooperation.
Make Good Bargains
Life is full of tradeoffs between benefits and costs. Sometimes the rewards of going for a run, getting fresh air, and improving health may be worth the cost of losing half an hour of work time while gaining a pair of achy legs.
Let It Go
Are you holding onto at least one thing that’s way past its expiration date? Self-critical thoughts, obsessions, defensive about your issues, or drinking too much. These things are relatively straightforward to deal with, even though it could be difficult.
Lean Into Good On First Waking
Try to influence your mind with positive and loving thoughts, when you wake.
Say Thanks
Say Thanks – it’s a small moment with big ripples. What do you feel when someone thanks you for something? For a comment in a meeting, a task done at home, an extra step taken, an encouraging word.
Find What’s Sacred
Sacred, has two meanings. One means spirituality, the other something precious. Try to identify what is sacred to you. Maybe you already know.
Empty the Cup
What’s the “wallpaper” in your own mind? Enjoy emptiness in the forms, the space between thoughts as your mind calms and becomes still, when you have no plans at all.
Embrace Fragility
Be mindful of both actual and potential fragility in yourself and others. Do what’s in your heart about what’s fragile in our world. Be at peace with the inevitable: things fall apart. Yet there is something beautiful about this part of the truth.
Drop Tart Tone
People are more sensitive to tone. To paraphrase the poet Maya Angelou, people will forget what you said, but they’ll remember how you made them feel.
Change the Channel
Sometimes when inner practices fail you, it helps to change the channel. A respite or some sort of pleasure will help to refuel you for challenges.
Stay Right When You’re Wronged
Blasting another person with anger is like throwing hot coals with bare hands: both people get burned. Speak calmly and from your heart, even when wronged.
Rest
Encourage your mind to come to rest at least occasionally. Tell the truth to yourself about how much time you actually – other than sleep.