Being Well Podcast: Speaking From the Heart
October 15, 2018

Today we’ll explore how to express undelivered communications with kindness and skill by speaking from the heart.

Think about a significant relationship. It could be with a mate, child, sibling, parent, friend, or co-worker. If you’ve felt let down, irritated, or hurt, have you been able to talk about it? If you appreciate or love this person, have you expressed it? If you’ve been at fault sometimes, have you admitted it?

When important things are left unsaid it leads to resentment, loneliness, and lost opportunities to discover our truth by speaking it. Our relationships are filled with moments where we could have said what’s felt good, what’s felt bad, and what could have been different.

Take a moment to think about the weight of what’s been unsaid in your relationships. What have the effects been on you and other people?

Today we’ll explore how to express those undelivered communications with kindness and skill. This includes:

  • Learning the different dangers that speaking from the heart presents, and how to cope with each.
  • How we can set the stage for a difficult conversation, and maximize our chances of success.
  • What it means to “start by joining.”
  • How to use wise speech in a practical way.
  • The power of honoring the fundamental questions others have.

Timestamps:

  • 1:25: What do you mean by speaking from the heart?
  • 3:00: What do we gain by speaking from the heart?
  • 5:10: Speaking the positive as well as the negative.
  • 6:20: The different dangers in speaking from the heart.
  • 8:00: Establishing safety.
  • 11:45: Being clear about our own facts.
  • 15:30: What are the results you’re aiming for?
  • 16:30: Talking about process.
  • 21:20: Knowing your line in the sand.
  • 22:30: Start by joining.
  • 26:00: Leading with “I feel.”
  • 28:15: Wise speech.
  • 35:20: Continuing to practice empathy.
  • 37:15: Nonviolent communication.
  • 40:15: Honoring other people’s fundamental questions.
  • 43:00: Recap

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Join Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson every week on the Being Well Podcast for lively and thought-provoking conversation and practical tips for being happier, building inner strengths, and getting the most out of life.

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