It’s easy to feel hurt, frustrated, or reactive when others let us down — or when we’re caught in old patterns of resentment and blame. But we actually have the power to influence how we see, feel about, and respond to other people. So this week I explored how to “love at will,” make positive deposits in our emotional memory bank, and draw on timeless Buddhist wisdom to live with more kindness, integrity, and peace — even when others are difficult.
Click here to join the free Wednesday Meditations – which are open to everyone!
Talk: How to Shift Your Thoughts and Feelings about Others
Timecodes & main topics:
- 00:00 – The Power to Choose Your Response: How most people assume their reactions to others are fixed — and how we can learn to guide them.
- 01:11 – Love at Will: A personal story of choosing compassion over reactivity in a painful relationship.
- 06:06 – Relationship Mood Banks: How our background mood toward others shapes every interaction.
- 10:51 – Seeing the Good Intention Beneath Behavior: Recognizing fear and longing underneath others’ difficult actions.
- 18:03 – Six Qualities from the Buddha for Living Well with Others: Kindness in body, speech, and mind; generosity; integrity; and wisdom.
- 26:02 – Blending Like Milk and Water: The sweetness of harmony and mutual respect in relationships.
- 29:57 – Even When You’re Hurt: The radical teaching of not letting hatred poison your heart — no matter what others do.
- 41:02 – Boundaries and Omnidirectional Goodwill: How to stay openhearted while also staying safe and grounded.
A Meditation: Embodied Uplifting into Vastness
In this meditation, we rest in the simple miracle of breathing — feeling supported by the body, the air, and the many forces that sustain life. As awareness moves through the belly, diaphragm, and heart, we open to steadiness, peace, and compassion. Gradually, this presence expands into the whole body — and into a felt sense of our own basic goodness and higher purpose. A gentle practice for returning home to yourself, one breath at a time.
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